There will always be that huge fight or argument in our relationships that might make us think or believe that the end of our union together has come, but after the fight and emotions are calm , there is need for us to try and make it work , that is when the need for help comes in and we must do our best to take our relationships to the next level.
Hi, my Blog family, its been a while i did a post on marriage and relationships and today am going to be sharing tips that i have used in my relationship to get past that awkward season after a fight or a very bitter quarrel.
As humans there is no way we can stay in a relationship or even live with some one without having issues , unless we want to mask our emotions and lie to ourselves which will not go well for us considering we all want to enjoy our relationships and take it to the next level.
So with that said ,it can be hard to think about still being with someone who just cursed you out a few days ago or said things you didn’t like and as such there is this thick cloud now with your heart telling you to let go and another telling you to hold on and not be foolish or be the soft one, i get it we all dont want to be taken for granted and that is totally fine but there are a few things to note and do if you choose to heal and move on after a fight.
Often times these arguments come up as a result of us trying to actually avoid a fight, or sort out issues , but things soon get out of hand, one wrong word is spoken here and the next thing is a messy fight, which you settle but there is this oddness in the air, you dont want to talk about it neither does your partner and the both of you carry on like that fight never happened, you have unanswered questions, you feel like you forgave too quickly or made it too easy for your partner
By not getting the much needed closure after a fight you are simply opening doors of resentment and doubts in your relationship, so the best thing to do will be the following,
- The very first thing to need to do is talk about the fight, without any form of anger , most people do the exact opposite and that wont help you heal or move forward, which isn’t what you want if your goal is to build a lasting relationship. Talk about everything, and also allow your partner talk , make sure you are listening this is very important
- After having the much needed talk , make sure that you are not just succumbing for peace to reign cos this will in no way help you, make sure that you are at least 60 percent comfortable with everything that has been poured out, succumbing will only leave you feeling used which will later grow to resentment.
- Give yourselves time to heal, dont expect you or your partner to just be back to how it used to be , some people take time to process things and get back to normal , allowing your self time will aid a better healing and a stronger union.
- Remind yourself why you are in this relationship, completely clear your mind of all negativity, reevaluate your stand, why you love your partner and why He or She is still worth your time and efforts ,if you come to a conclusion that all is still worth it, then by all means continue but if you discover that your life is at risk or you have been devalued and treated less of yourself without any sign of change then its time to move on because you deserve Happiness
Arguments and fights are only supposed to help us know our partners better , thus strengthen our love life , we get to learn more about our partner, they trigger buttons and how to deal with them, it is never the end of a relationship, plus it is very important to note that how your partner reacts when they are angry will tell you a lot about them and if there are tendencies to be violent, be sure to choose your words carefully during an argument as it will be harder to retrieve once its out.
I hope this post has been helpful, you can head over to my YouTube channel by clicking the YouTube icon up there to watch my video on how to make your marriage work in 2020, be sure to subscribe to the channel while you are there, feel free to leave me your comments and question, i would be glad to answer them. See you in my next post Xoxo